Three Dads Walking: A busy year in 'the club no-one wants to join'

The Three Dads Walking have had a busy year, trekking hundreds of miles to raise awareness of suicide in memory of their daughters. The BBC has been reflecting with them on what they have accomplished and what they want to happen next.

They say they are part of a club no-one wants to be in, and yet sadly they are always meeting new members.

Andy Airey, Mike Palmer and Tim Owen have each lost a daughter to suicide.

United by their grief and a desire to prevent others finding themselves in the same situation, they have completed two long-distance walks to raise awareness of suicide and are campaigning for it to be a mandatory lesson in schools.

"After you have been through something like we and and our families have been through, you've got to try and get something positive out of it," Tim says.

His daughter Emily took her own life in March 2020. She was 18 years old.

"You've got to keep going as a human being, but if you can make things slightly better for another person, that gives you hope," Tim adds.

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The three dads have learned a lot very quickly about suicide, Andy says, and were shocked to find it was the biggest killer of under 35s in the UK.

"If that's the case," Andy, whose daughter Sophie died shortly before Christmas 2018 aged 29, says, "why aren't we doing something about it?"

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Mike, whose daughter Beth died at the age of 17 a few days before Emily, adds: "We believe we can prevent so many young suicides."

Their first walk in October 2021 started at Andy's home in Morland, Cumbria, then headed to Sale in Greater Manchester where Mike lives before finishing at Tim's home in Shouldham, Norfolk.

It took them 15 days to walk the 300-mile route and they raised almost £1m for suicide prevention charity Papyrus, receiving endorsements from celebrities including Daniel Craig and Nicole Kidman.

If the first walk was about raising funds and awareness, the second, which began in September, was much more of a campaign.

They want suicide prevention included in the national curriculum.

The trio spent a month walking 600 miles between the four parliaments of the UK to implore politicians to consider their request.

They got a good luck message from James Bond star Craig, were serenaded with a ballad penned in their honour by folk band the Young Uns, and spent a night at the home of Greater Manchester mayor Andy Burnham.

"What they are doing is tremendously important," Mr Burnham said. "It's a conversation the nation just has to have."

While tucking into a homemade curry at the mayor's house, the dads were surprised by a visit from former England football manager Sam Allardyce and ex-Liverpool striker Robbie Fowler.

"There's a lot of bravado," Mr Fowler said, adding: "But certainly people are starting to talk about [mental health] more."

Mr Allardyce praised the trio's determination, before adding to raucous laughter: "Because in all fairness they don't look the fittest."

Along the way they got lost in fields, scorched by the sun and drenched with rain, the latter worse for Mike who managed to break his waterproof trousers.

But the most profound memories came from bereaved parents they met along the way.

Like Pete Kelly who had lost his son Jamie aged 17, or Tracey Hargreaves, whose son Charlie, also 17, took his own life in 2020.

The Three Dads spent a night at the Lancashire home of Martin Tomlinson, whose daughter Tilly killed herself at the age of 26, and met mums in Wales who had lost children to suicide.

There was Emma Webb, whose daughter Brodie died three years ago at the age of 16, who says suicide needs to be discussed even though it is such an uncomfortable subject.

"Suicide is a scary word for parents but losing your child and realising you've got live the rest of your lives without them is a million times scarier," she said.

Paula Poole's son Rhydian was 18 when he took his own life in November 2020.

She said her rugby-mad son "got lost" and "didn't know where he was going or what he had to look forward to", one of the many similar stories told to the three dads.

"People came from across the country to walk with us," Tim says, adding: "They were excited about walking with us but when you learned why they were walking, because they had lost a son or daughter, to have that support was absolutely incredible."

Their trek took in Belfast, Edinburgh and Cardiff before ending down the Mall in London, "pied piper style" according to Andy with a flock of people joining them for the last few miles.

Their efforts earned them a Pride of Britain award, with Carol Vorderman calling them "incredible", adding: "[Suicide's] a lot bigger than we recognise."

They have no more walks planned for now but that is not to say they are stopping.

More than 150,000 people signed an online petition which is enough for Parliament to consider a debate on the subject, although it is yet to take place.

The government has previously said suicide prevention can be taught to age-appropriate children, but the three dads say it needs to be compulsory and start early.

"We can keep walking and we can keep talking but it's the power-makers, the politicians, who need to make the difference now," Tim says.

The dads hope the way they are using their grief will stop others from having to suffer it too, as well as helping them cope with their losses.

"Bereavement by suicide is such an excruciating pain," Andy says adding: "It's horrible.

"When it first happens you do wonder how you will survive.

"I've got a Sophie-sized hole in my life that can never be filled, but by doing something to help other people you become more protected from that gaping void."

Mike says he never believed his daughter actually wanted to die.

"If she was looking down she would say 'dad, don't let others do what I did'."